In the previous article, I discussed questions that will arise when we start to think about the categories in life that we are in. There are 100s of categories we can set our mind to and eventually it will become 1000s. As long as we procrastinate or be uncertain about whatever happening in our life, we will never get a chance to move forward in life. We don’t need anybody to pull you back, we will keep doing that to ourselves easily. This deep thinking about the topics that don’t make sense to live your life happily is like a toxic substance, killing life and happiness.
In this part 2 of the series, we will discuss the common problems that we are all facing and stuck in life as human beings at a young age. The list of problems is infinite and we can list all of them daily but yet they increase. You might be wondering where I am coming from. Let me tell you a small story of mine, I have friends and I had many best friends in my life and the people in those places changed and got replaced one after the other. People fade away but the place that you have for the particular relationships will get replaced.
For example, from 2014 to 2019 I had 2 best friends in my life, and maybe one best friendship was started to become the love of my life. At last, those friends parted ways with me. That doesn’t mean friendship got ended in my life. Fortunately, now I have 3 best friends instead of 2. As long as we don’t practice acceptance in life, we are miserable. You gotta accept life as it is and find your way of happiness. If you wait for something or someone to change for you, trust me then you are a frog in the well. That’s not gonna happen. Maybe if you find the perfect ideal partner for your life — It’s just bullshit thinking. There is nothing called perfect in this world. There is no perfection. We all just learn from our past and we evolve to become better every day in life that’s it.
Let’s see about life and happiness in simple yet powerful 4 ways:
- Turn your shit in.
- Allow others to help you or suggest you (Have a mentor or let someone into your core).
- Be happy if challenges are coming your way.
- If you are in love, don’t get attached to the person get attached to the relationship.
#1: Turn your shit in
Life is miserable but yet it is beautiful. Live every day and die slowly. One or the other day you will so why worry about that when you don’t know your expiry date. Eventually, everything falls in one place and we all share the same fate as all other creatures — Death. As Sadhguru says, “Death is not a destination, it is a process.”
So we all have limited time and very limited people we can meet in the process. We all know we live an average of about 20000 days. For example, even if we try hard and meet 10 people every day, we cannot cover 1% of the world throughout our lifetime. This is a staggering stat to consider and keep reminding ourselves that how huge this life pool is. So in this very limited time create something huge for yourself. I know it is easy to say and difficult to execute — If you are thinking this now, let me ask you one thing what other choice do you have in life? Do you have the ability to change things or did you attain one? If the answer is no, continue reading.
Remember this one thing in life always, problems will be there for everyone, It is what makes us strong and bold. If you keep thinking that you are unfortunate in life, consider the people who have limited food to eat each day and fewer clothes to wear. At least you have a house to live and parents to love and friends to care for you. If you are not grateful for what you have then you will never be happy in life. This is just the dogma and the trap you are living in. If you are in this situation, tell yourself that you are already trapped in your own boundary or walls. Break it! Turn your shit in.
Life is huge and you are the one who can live your own life there is no substitute for the game you are playing, you gotta play all by yourself. Others might give you an assist but you should be the one to score a goal and beat the goalie or dribble your way past defenders (Consider as challenges in life). Don’t carry the weight on your shoulders, if you are willing to pass it, help will come on its way. There are no shortcuts for you.
#2: Allow others to help you or suggest you (Have a mentor or let someone in to your core)
It is difficult for some of us out there to lead lives because of some self-respect and ego problems. If someone closer to them say or suggests anything for their own wellness they might feel that the whole world is there to speak against them. Remember this, “People scold you because they care for you. Strangers will never care for you no matter what. There are 7 other billion people in life and not everyone will care for you or even know you at all.”
It is not so bad to ask for help from others who care for you and let them in your life add their mind to your problems and suggest you a better way to come out of it or even bring you out of it. If you don’t trust how you can trust the things that are all happening around you? Tomorrow a solar flare may hit our planet and we all may perish, right? Do you have a guarantee that it will not happen? Likewise, people will not come to our lives with guarantees and stay for long. They just simply come and go and on the way, they will help us to be a better version of ourselves.
If we are facing trouble from opening up to someone or anyone, it is better to follow certain steps to make ourselves feel like not for sale in the market. Keep improving yourself and be the better version of yourself. This can be done by the cultivation of micro habits. It is good to create habits like exercising, traveling to an unknown place, or even spending time alone in attaining knowledge. Taking a deep breath might help when you are feeling like your life is not going anywhere.
“You are alone is responsible for your happiness but letting in the person of people whom you trust can act as a catalyst. Never think that another person will come and solve all of your problems. Yes! It is the hard-learned fact by millions of people around us. So, it’s time for you to understand the same.”
Vishruth Harithsa
#3 Be happy if challenges are coming your way
Think about the world we are living in. It is fragile and filled with technology lines and also with poor and homelessness for many living organisms. Challenges pop in everybody’s life and because of that how many of us thrive? Almost everyone in their own way. These difficult times don’t come to us to make us weak or to lose hope. They are there to make you stronger and prepare us for the worst. Worse things happen always. Death might come or you might become a millionaire in a year and lose all your fortune in a single day because the stock fell.
Remember how you were when you started something for yourself in life. Maybe it is your first venture, first love, first job, first-team, or your first leadership role in a big company. It is always a special moment, right? Now, remember you got promoted for the 10th time? How does it look or feel for you? Like, Just another day, didn’t you? This happens because of one of the 2 reasons, One — You stopped celebrating your success as it is like a home to you, or Two — You lost that zeal to celebrate it due to some intense situations that already made you weak.
Make sure to celebrate everything in life, whether is sadness or happiness. Either way, parties should not stop; celebrating life mustn’t stop. Challenges keep coming and sad moments keep passing in your sky like a cloud that never falls. It’s YOU who is the sole reason to live on this planet. Not for money, not for pride, not for justice, not for revenge, and not for compromises; live only for YOURSELF and to understand what’s happening inside you. After all, you are a piece of the universe.
#4 If you are in love, don’t get attached to the person get attached to the relationship
Be like a lotus, even though it lives on the water, its leaf never catches water. Be in love and love the people around you. Fall in love and enjoy life while it lasts but don’t get attached in a way that affects your happiness in life. Starting a relationship with a person is easy once you feel closer to him/her. Maintaining the same tempo and intensity is very difficult. Never show your weakness or your inside thoughts to them. Only you should be responsible for making you happy. Don’t say without you my life is over, instead tell them that with you my life will be beautiful.
You should live without that person. That person was not there with you from your birth, no matter how much you love the other person there is always a dark side when it comes to hurting their egos. When that starts affecting, crack develops in that relationship. It is like the patching of wheels. It simply gets old and becomes due for replacement.
Get attached to the relationship. I mean love. Love to love or to fall in love. If the person changes himself/herself over time, move on and find another (unless you are not married). Search for the person in your life who understands you and makes you feel yourself when you are with them. Keep very low expectations infarct zero expectation. Don’t cry when you get hurt or hurt the other person. It is all common in any relationship including friendship too. It is all part of cementing process. The more you fight, the better you understand the downsides and strong sides of your relationship with the person.
The day you start expecting, the day your fall starts in the mind of the person you love or vice versa. Hence, keep your head straight all the time and enjoy life as it is. Altering life or forcing others to live for you is all temporary.
Vishruth Harithsa
Conclusion:
So, these points that are mentioned above are from my experience & research I did from others’ life and my life. It will work for all of us when we put ourselves first and seek to understand rather than be understood. Change starts from you. Bury your past and move on with your present. I read in tweets that once you get feelings on a person it will never go in life no matter how you hate them, that feeling of care will always be there so don’t resist care but to resist to get attached. Find those happy moments in life and inspire yourself to live with them. Nothing can stop you or no challenge can bring you down. Remember to take help or ask questions when it is required. You are not a sheep to follow bling orders. Turn your shit in and stop caring for the things that bring you down. Go farther, grow bigger and live stronger. Life is full of questions and to find answers always try to look in you first and then start looking for answers in the world or other people. 99% of the time I am sure you will find answers inside you.
Keep Reading and Inspire others as well if you feel this article is worthy of sharing with someone close to you.
